Excited & Scared

Do you do New Year’s resolutions?
Do you choose a word for the year?
Do you vision board?
*I used to do all of these things.*

I love the naturally built-in reflection and renewal time stepping over the threshold into a shiny, sparkly new year offers — Looking back over the ups and downs, the gains and the shortfalls of the year and considering how I would like the new year to be different.

I haven’t tried resolutions the last couple years.
And choosing an intention/word for the year and vision boarding fell to the wayside after the utter unpredictability of 2020.

But in December as I reflected on the change I want to see in 2023, I kept thinking about “intention” and “expand” and I have landed on the word GROWTH.

There has been a great deal of change in our lives in the last year or two. Baby Girl was born in July 2020 and my record for full-nights-sleep-in-a-row since then has been 4. Four nights sleep before it all fell apart again. (That was last month.)

We moved three times — once from our home into a rental to get through the major / seriously-we-can’t-live-here-now renovations; then back from the rental into the beautiful remodeled house; and then God moved us to camp! All within 11 months.

It was enough to just buckle up and hold on for the bumpy ride.

But now (even with the continued poor sleep….oooh Mama is T I R E D), it feels like it’s time to grow.

In October 2021, I started freelancing as a writer, grants mostly but also some marketing/media content. I initially reached out to an arts organization who know me really well and who I know are working to make art really impactful and accessible. They invited me to work in support of their team and then become part of their team.
I have expanded to five clients I work for regularly. There’s a potential new client on the horizon (and I am always up for referrals. 😉 )

This kind of work means that most of my writing energies are directed toward seeking funds for organizations and artists and very little is directed toward my own creative endeavors.

The ideas are there….simmering away on the back burners.
But how do I not let those pots boil dry when so much else requires my attention?

Several of my past vision boards have included writing.
I started this blog and was sort of consistent for awhile (then 2020 and baby and blah blah blah).
I have an idea for a novel.
I have an idea for a collection of short stories.
I have a few ideas for plays. (because theatre artist. shrug.)

But this year is about GROWTH.
And this year I am writing a play.
Not thinking about it occasionally whilst driving or trying to fall asleep.
I. Am. Writing. A. Play.
Because someone asked me to.
Because someone trusts me to.

I have written and/or adapted stories into original works in the past when I was working with high school theatre students and was so often hard pressed to find published works that served our purposes and I felt I could commit weeks and months of my creativity and time to. And sometimes I just found a story that said, “TELL ME!”

It’s not public yet, so I can’t say much, but I am excited to be working with producers who trust me and encourage me. I am excited (and scared) to create something new and to be afforded the time and space to do so.

There’s a contract.
There are deadlines.
There is compensation that allows that pot to move to the front burner.

That also means I have to DO IT.
Someone is expecting something from me.

Time to step out of that ol’ comfort zone and G R O W!